Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
We're like a lot better than the average bears
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
