im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize