i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
