Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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