I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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