He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
