My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
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