Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
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