belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
