did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Randomize