she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I need to align my fucking chakras
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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