grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
