i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
