he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Randomize
