dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
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