whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
