It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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