End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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