Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Randomize
