She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
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