The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
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