if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
