you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
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