I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
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