I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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