Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Randomize
