hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
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