Texts From Last Night

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  (862): View more from New Jersey

  textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.

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  (862): textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me (973): that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world. http://tfl.nu/8ia3
  Replies (27) Good night (808) Bad night (2359)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore

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  (443): Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore http://tfl.nu/frxj
  Replies (9) Good night (2928) Bad night (602)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..

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  (201): its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin.. http://tfl.nu/g7eu
  Replies (30) Good night (913) Bad night (8522)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.

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  (732): i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is. http://tfl.nu/s7zh
  Replies (16) Good night (4912) Bad night (1585)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever

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  (330): fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever http://tfl.nu/itin
  Replies (11) Good night (5029) Bad night (1097)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow

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  (404): I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow http://tfl.nu/bfg7
  Replies (14) Good night (3276) Bad night (1341)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.

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  (502): Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit. http://tfl.nu/13ky
  Replies (9) Good night (2437) Bad night (931)
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  (229): View more from Georgia

  I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.

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  (229): I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did. http://tfl.nu/0cy8
  Replies (12) Good night (1228) Bad night (759)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?

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  (703): you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat? http://tfl.nu/6p3h
  Replies (8) Good night (849) Bad night (1727)
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  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?

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  (506): Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant? http://tfl.nu/bdft
  Replies (3) Good night (691) Bad night (601)
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  (251): View more from Alabama

  my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.

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  (251): my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car. http://tfl.nu/1aw9
  Replies (2) Good night (397) Bad night (615)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous

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  (801): You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous http://tfl.nu/k8ug
  Replies (1) Good night (737) Bad night (501)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.

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  (302): On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better. http://tfl.nu/rs0b
  Replies (8) Good night (1095) Bad night (236)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing

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  (425): Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing http://tfl.nu/hqjw
  Replies (2) Good night (602) Bad night (246)
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  (858): View more from California

  I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"

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  (858): I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well" http://tfl.nu/9o99
  Replies (1) Good night (583) Bad night (225)

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