thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Randomize
