But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Randomize
