haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Randomize
