I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
