I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
