Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
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