So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize