The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize