I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
