Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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