Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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