I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
