haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
