We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I lost the right to judge tonight
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize