Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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