ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
