If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
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