I heard we made out
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
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I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
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I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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