is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Randomize