Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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