Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
