I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Randomize