I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
