it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize